Saturday, August 08, 2009

I choose me

As many of you may or may not know, I broke it off with Asher about a month and a half ago. It has been hard, hence the not keeping up with my blog. I realize that a lot of this blog is/was dedicated to our relationship together.

We really had differing ideas of what it meant to be in a relationship and how you treat the person you are in a relationship with. I believe that a relationship is about give and take. I believed that if I gave when he needed me to give, i.e. supporting him in all of his artistic endeavors, his health, etc. he would give to me when it was my turn. i.e. my desire to finally get married. After 5 years, it was never my turn. I gave and he gladly took and there was never a foreseeable time when he ever would stop taking.

So I chose me.

Choosing yourself is hard. Especially when you are such a giving person, but sometimes you just have to. My life was starting to make me miserable.

I guess everyone comes into your life for a reason, maybe his was to get me here. I still love L.A. I am very fortunate to be able to stay here and I hope to give you more of an update now that I am feeling more healed. I actually feel relieved if you can believe it.

Thank you to all of you who have been extremely supportive of me. I am very lucky to have family and friends like you.

Love.-k